I'm a Creep, I'm a Weirdo, What the Hell am I Doing Here?

I know everybody pores with rapt attention at the letters to the editor in the APA Proceedings, but maybe a handful of people, like me, haven't found the time to look at the latest issue. Lucky for us, PJMB reader J never misses an issue, and points me to this letter (sub. req., I think) from James Madison philosopher Charles Bolyard. It has his fourth-grade son's description of last year year's Eastern APA:

2 days after Christmas I went to a philosophy confrence [sic]. It was horrible. There were 200 philosophers. They all did weird things. They couldn't make jokes, many had beards.

In the elevator it was worse. Once a philosopher got off on the wrong floor, so said, "wait for me." "We'll take you to the 27th," said another. Nobody laughed. "Get it there are only 10 floors," said some random old guy in a country accent. You get the point it was creepy.

. . . I'll never go to a philosophy confrence [sic] again.

"They couldn't make jokes, many had beards. . . . You get the point[,] it was creepy." Yes. I do get the point. I get the point loud and clear.